Mrs. Kwan

028506 4.jpg

Mrs. Kwan is a Taiwanese overweight babysitter who falls asleep during her job. She was portrayed by Amy Hill. When Joan gets called to go back to the office, she asks Mrs. Kwan to babysit her kids much to Conrad's dismay. Her weight and sleep serves as a running gag. Right before Joan leaves she emphasis to Mrs. Kwan that the children are not allowed to watch television. After she leaves, Mrs. Kwan sees just how sad Sally and Conrad are. Sympathetically, she decides to secretly defy Joan's rules and slyly invites Sally and Conrad to watch television with her without letting Joan know. Happy, they join her on the couch as she puts on the television. However, she ends up watching a show they are unable to follow much to their sheer dismay and content.

Extended Lore

In the extended lore it is revealed that Mrs Kwan is not in fact Taiwanese but is instead a Russian spy looking to annihilate Whoville. This is explained in the limited run Dr. Seuss comic book series published by MARVEL. Later it was learned that she had ascended to the class of of celestial being shortly after she had killed Hitler and later Stalin. As of issue #6 she had been hired as a hitman to kill fascists and dictators around the Andromeda galaxy. Her heroism was final recognized in issue #19 after she had saved Larry Quinn from Thing Three in the Dark Sludge saga. In issue #27 after the Anti-Reflupper took over her brain, Mrs. Kwan gained the powers of teleportation. However, it corrupted her mind leading her to destroy Whoville for Russia, and hope was nearly lost until Karlos K. Krinklebine used the power of the Animatrotron to save Whoville. In issue #53 she murdered a young woman in her home named Caitlin Nicholson and used her corpse as a puppet, and was last seen boarding American airlines flight 93 before the plane tragically struck the north-west tower of The World Trade centre on September 11th 2001. Her fate is currently unknown.

Powers

Flight, super-seduction, near-immortality, super speed, enhanced reflexes, shape-shifting and teleportation. She is also known to posses several infinity stones which she smuggled into Guantanamo Bay by shoving them up her asshole.

Hobbies

Watching Taiwanese Parliament on the television, looking after little angels, collecting infinity stones, eating and sleeping. Mrs. Kwan has also been known to partake in prostitution and illegal arms smuggling.

Community content is available under CC-BY-SA unless otherwise noted.